Getting More Honest In Prayer: How God Sees Our Anger

Are you angry at God? Do you feel disappointed, hurt, or confused by him? This is a normal part of grief. However, many people, inside and outside the church, have been taught to suppress their negative emotions. We learn early on to hide our true feelings, but this comes at a cost to our body, mind, and relationships.

In this article, we share a question from our Grief and Trauma Q&A session, in which Peter McNaught, a Pastor and Spiritual Director, explains why God is neither bothered by nor indifferent to the heavy emotions we experience. Here is Peter's response.

What If I'm Angry at God for Not Protecting Me from Pain?

Being angry with God is a very human and relatable experience. I would honestly be surprised if someone had never felt anger toward God at some point in their lives. In my experience, this can feel especially scary for many people—Christian or not—because we are taught to honor God. That teaching can sometimes turn into the belief that we are not allowed to be honest with Him. But that simply isn’t true. Real honor requires honesty.

Is Anger Toward God Biblical?

I often see two extreme responses to anger toward God. One is holding tightly to that anger and letting it define the relationship. The other is being afraid to admit it at all, believing that God is too holy to handle our honesty. Scripture tells a different story.

If you read the Psalms, you’ll notice many begin with anger, despair, or confusion and later move toward praise or thanksgiving. It’s easy to assume they were written in one sitting and that we must always end our prayers on a hopeful note. But many of these Psalms are poems, lyrics, or songs, and they likely weren’t written all at once. There may have been long stretches of anger before resolution came. Sometimes God may even help finish the poem.

How Can Honesty With God Help Me Heal?

Being angry with God is absolutely normal, and honesty is a crucial part of healing. I have a close friend who struggled deeply with his faith and couldn’t bring himself to pray at all. He felt stuck in the loop of wondering whether God was real and, if so, what he was even supposed to say. One day, out of frustration and confusion, he finally said, “Okay, God, as you already know…” That simple sentence opened the door for honest conversation. Acknowledging that God already knew his thoughts freed him to speak truthfully.

Can Lament Be a Way of Connecting With God?

I recently read a book that defined confession as simply telling the truth. Not just saying you’re sorry, but naming what has already happened and what you are truly feeling. Whether your story includes loss, anger, confusion, or grief, going to God with honesty is what lament is all about.

Lament is the expression of inner grief. It is finding words for pain and bringing them to God. Honest prayer—including anger—is part of that process. Being honest with God and with yourself can be very hard, but it is also deeply healing. And I can assure you, God is not intimidated by your anger.

Listen to The Grief & Trauma Podcast Episode

About Peter McNaught, Pastor

Peter McNaught is an ordained pastor in the Wesleyan Church and a certified Spiritual Director. He leads Refuge Missional Community Church in Greenville, MI, two Protestant services at a local prison, and conducts a spiritual retreat on an annual men's canoe trip to Ontario. He offers both individual and group spiritual direction, which is an ancient Christian practice to cultivate awareness of God and learn to hear His voice in your everyday relationship with Jesus. He also leads group sessions on specific topics, including grief and eros love in human sexuality. Connect with him here.